it hurts.

thinking of what happen today , couldn't be much less painful . my brain couldn't think what's going to happen sooner or later but I just hope and pray that it wouldn't , you don't know how worried I am to lose to her ? you just think you sweet talk me and tell me that everything's going to be alright and I'll be fine ? it's not going to happen , it's not how it works my dear ... I really just hope she would she vanish and wish she had never existed .